Thanks

Thank you for the encouragement, friends and family. I always feel silly after I vent, but I know it's not good to wallow in my "depths of despair". It's very easy for me to get there. How easy it is for me to forget who I am! I attended a Bible study based on a book called "the Safest Place on Earth" taught by my friend Crissy. It made me see how good it is to be able to talk to friends about being discouraged and how awesome the love of Christ is.

Did you ever think the Old Testament Israelites were complete idiots? These people just couldn't pull it together! They were given chance after chance and still would fail, be punished, and then repent. The same cycle over and over. And still He loved them and called them to Himself. How stupid am I? These people are my example. This is what we do as believers. My life is a constant cycling of repentance, discontent, rebellion, punishment, repentance. And yet He loves me. I forget so easily who I am. And yet, I am still who I am, even in my forgetfulness. I am still His daughter. His love is perfect. I am a narcissisistic fool. And He loves me. I am wallowing in self-pity. And He calls me. I am distracted by my own desires and sin. And He has already forgiven me.

Thanks for the reminder. I'll probably fall on my face again. And again...