Happy With Myself?

This summer has been interesting. It's almost over; we leave in three days. I'm glad to go back to a normal life and spend more time with the kids and my husband.


And yet, there will be things that I miss. It seems hard to believe, but I'll miss the craziness here. It's what I've gotten the most irritated with, but it seems almost normal for there to be so much going on. I will miss food. We eat like kings here. It's really nice to think, "I'd love to have some Dove chocolate," and it's right there. or fried cheesesticks. or meat. I'll miss the director and his family. I was ungracious to him in my previous blog. He's the most gracious, loving man. He's perfect for this job. (there was miscommunication about the rules) I'll miss the girls the most. They've taught me so much. There is always laughter here. I have laughed so hard that I've nearly wet my pants. Tears are here, too, but they are good for healing. They look at me like a mama, even though I'm not that much older than they. They adore Quinn, and they love my children.

Lifeline is an amazing ministry. It is well run, despite its human incapabilities. They really try to show the girls grace through an impossible time in there lives. I'll never forget the week that Ava was born. She was born on July 19. I was with her mother and we had grown close. I saw the baby in the hospital and had prepared myself (or so I thought) for the inevitable adoption. I did okay in the hospital and goofed around with her mother and just sat with her a lot. Two weeks later I went with her mother to see her before she was adopted. The mother immediately burst into tears. So did I. She had tried to remain detached, but just missed her baby. I cannot imagine her heartache. I saw the teeniest measure of it and it broke me. I cried about Ava everytime I thought about her. And with her mother, I have shared something with her that has created a bond of friendship that is almost sisterlike. She left a few weeks after and I was very depressed when she was gone. She's back now because Lifeline allows post-adoptive mothers to come back and try to put their lives together by getting a job and providing a stable environment. God brought us here to shape us and mold us for his purpose. I hope to still be involved with Lifeline for a long time. (We are going to be relief parents.) I'm so glad that this ministry exists.

The week that Ava was born we got a birth announcement from Meghan and Jeromy Thompson announcing the adoption of their son through Lifeline. It was so exciting! They had tried for so long to get pregnant and God had a different way for them.