Thursday, October 12, 2006

BY MYSELF (please)

I love being here. It's very nice that the children have lots of space to play and I like homeschooling. I enjoy having a relatively clean home and that laundry stays pretty much under control. I also love that I don't have to run all over the place everyday and I can have a cup of coffee with a friend who just happens to be my neighbor/landlord. These things are all very nice. very nice, indeed. indeed....

I am NEVER satisfied. Last week felt like a vacation in our new home. This week I'm jealous of my husband's job. I don't want a job, I like my job at home. I really just want to do something by myself. (By myself means without the children) I could be with six of my girlfriends and it would equal being by myself.

I sound so selfish. I think I actually told Quinn that I was jealous of him the other day. He just looked at me. I beg God to give us this job and our own place and here I am. Um, maybe what I meant to say was that I needed a million dollars and a nanny to keep in my closet and hire her when I want to go thrifting.

Gotta go save the baby.

5 comments:

Michelle said...

Yeah!! I was so glad to see a post from you. You must add to my scarey Halloween story on my blog...please...you would make it sooo good and terrifing.

Crissy said...

I find myself ever dissatisfied. I want something... I get it... I want something else. and on and on it goes. I think contentment requires more faith than jumping off a burning building.

Amber said...

Kim, thanks for sharing what is inside of all of us...always wanting the next big thing. It happens to me in CA too!! I think it is a result of our sinfulness and our own inability to find true contentment in Christ. Can be done with His help of course...and I selfishly proclaim: "even so, Jesus, please come quickly!!!"

Abbey said...

I love your honesty...I never tire of hearing what's on someone else's heart. I stuggle with the same things, Kim, almost moment to moment, some days. I doubt the longing for more will ever subside until I meet Jesus face to face and enter into perfect relationship with Him in heaven. What a day that will be!

squeaky said...

why is the grass always greener on the other side of the fence? i so don't want my job. i want to stay home. and i totally know what you mean by doing something "by yourself." hang in there, girl