Today I had the most gloriously lazy day. I am reading a fabulous book (Scent of Water by Elizabeth Goudge) and it was raining and chilly. I listened to Coldplay and laid on my bed, unmade of course, and did very little of anything else. School for Corin was "Halloween Math" (3 pumpkins plus 2 pumpkins equals what?), and him laying on the bed with me, Silas, and Felix practicing reading SILENTLY.
I read for hours. Then, my sense and obligation got the best of me and I did laundry and cleaned. Que sera! (Go ahead, sing it. I did.)

I miss checking my blog daily. Dear blog friends, I miss you! Hopefully we will soon have internet actually in our home. I love living here, by the way. There's constantly someone stopping by for a chat a cup of coffee. It's my 1950's dreamland. You're invited, by the way. Calling is only necessary if you'd like for me to be clean. I don't care. 640-5577

I AM A JERK


Yesterday, or maybe the day before, I was talking to my lovely sister in Florida. We had a lovely phone conversation and I missed her very much. She has four sweet children and I long to see them. Anyway, we are friends now, although we used to fight quite a bit when we were younger. We were also competitive, not in sports, but in social circles. She was, and is, very beautiful and I always felt that I was in her shadow. I'm sure that she, as a normal sibling, was jealous of things that I could do (of course, I never knew I could do anything good). These things we grew "out of" and became nice grownups. Now we are competitive in vague, subtle ways. It's hard to admit it, but there are still things I am jealous of her about.

She ran a 5K. Wow. I so cannot run a 5K. I was proud of her, of course. And I said as much. But, (this is where I am a jerk) my first thought was NOT how proud I was of her for completing a 5K before she turned 30. It was (sigh) "she better not be skinnier than me." Woah. bitchy. I am way too human. I so want to be a person who desires to seek Christ. Or maybe I just want to be viewed that way. Frustrating to be in this human shell.

BY MYSELF (please)

I love being here. It's very nice that the children have lots of space to play and I like homeschooling. I enjoy having a relatively clean home and that laundry stays pretty much under control. I also love that I don't have to run all over the place everyday and I can have a cup of coffee with a friend who just happens to be my neighbor/landlord. These things are all very nice. very nice, indeed. indeed....

I am NEVER satisfied. Last week felt like a vacation in our new home. This week I'm jealous of my husband's job. I don't want a job, I like my job at home. I really just want to do something by myself. (By myself means without the children) I could be with six of my girlfriends and it would equal being by myself.

I sound so selfish. I think I actually told Quinn that I was jealous of him the other day. He just looked at me. I beg God to give us this job and our own place and here I am. Um, maybe what I meant to say was that I needed a million dollars and a nanny to keep in my closet and hire her when I want to go thrifting.

Gotta go save the baby.

FAVORITES

Today, in the pool house where we now live, I was thinking of all the things I love about life. I will share them with you and let you ponder.

I love to read books that I can't put down.

I love to listen to Over the Rhine.

I love coffee with Coffeemate Creme Brulee creamer. Delicious. Especially when Felix is taking his morning nap.

I love to toast by the pool. Except that now I'm 31 and so I have a big hat and my Jackie Onasis sunglasses on. Very glamorous, I know.

I love when the children are drowsy and cuddly.

I love theme parks.

I looooooooove chocolate. Except for Tootsie Rolls. Gross.

I love to eat. Mmmmm... Cheesecake, pizza, steak (medium rare), fried cheese sticks, artichoke dip, chocolate covered raisins, REAL SOUR CREAM, salsa from Sol Azteca, vanilla bean ice cream with cut up bananas and chocolate syrup.... ok done.

I love my husband. Bow, chicka , bow wow

I love yummy babies, hence previous favorite.

I love Big Saver Thrift Store. By myself.

I love to laugh until I nearly pee my pants with my friends. I also love that, as a group of friends, we can completely ignore our lot of children and laugh until we nearly pee our pants as a group.

I love my sister. And I miss her.

I love to play Spades.

I love the smell of Thanksgiving at my parents house.

I love the anticipation of an event, even though it may be miniscule. Like going to Target, by myself.

I love my church.

I love watching movies with my husband, even though he teases me when I run to the kitchen when I'm scared.

I love to blog.